The Mindful Man: Words from the Earth (2018) by Caspar Walsh, Book Review

The Mindful Man: Words from the Earth (2018) by Caspar Walsh

In my opinion, the concept of mindfulness is not unique to Buddhism and/or Hinduism. It is an ancient eastern practice that evolve and may or may not be called 'mindfulness' that you can also find in other religions, teachings, and traditions. As for Christianity and the Old Testament Jewish religion, the closest, almost similar practice that I can think of is Meditation in Biblical terms. But here is the main difference: Mindfulness focuses on self, which is good if done properly (yet limited in its scope) but Biblical Meditation focuses on the One true God, YHWH. The basic attitude of Mindfulness is 'what's I'm doing, thinking and feeling right now' but the attitude of Biblical Meditation is 'delight in the law (or word) of the LORD day and night' (for example, refer to Psalms 1:2). Once you know the difference then, reading books like this one from other beliefs and worldviews, can be much profitable and safer for the soul.

The definition of mindfulness can be very fluid. So, let me quote the author, Caspar Walsh, to explain it for himself: "Mindfulness sums up meditation, focus, attention, and reflection in a single word. But it is also a paradox. Breaking it down suggests mind-fullness, the fullness of mind - exactly the opposite of what a beginner's mind is hoping to achieve. Mindfulness means focusing, bringing our mind to what we are doing, and paying close attention. In a wider sense, it explores the whole experience of being human. The mind is an essential tool for interpreting, translating, and finding meaning in the world around us and inside us. It is essential to living in every sense." Without God as the center focus of the mind, I can only agree with the author from the human perspective. No more. Nevertheless, it is an important aspect to consider about since most of us - men, especially - need to be self-aware of what's going on within us and around us. We are so engaged with technology, concerned about other people's lives on social media, and busy with work that we neglect self-care and what's going on with our lives. Most men are lost, purposeless, and tired. We need a guide.

For some men, Caspar Walsh's The Mindful Man can be the beginning of that journey. This book doesn't have all the answers. In fact, it has lots of helpful reflection questions and insights to consider. "The world needs mindful men, now more than ever. Men who understand what makes us tick, aware of the impact we are having on the lives of others." Elsewhere he also wrote, "We need to up our game, daily. We are the leaders we're been waiting for. In a world divided by fear and greed, it's time to look deeper into what we can do to ground ourselves, ready ourselves, to be of service to our friends, our communities, and our highest ideals... How do we become mindful men who can be trusted, respected, and called on to begin the healing? It is essential for all men to be initiated into the mature, sacred masculine. And for this, we need courage." Yes, we need the courage to examine ourselves to be better men. In this book, Walsh invites us to 'see' the ideals of a Physical Man, Emotional Man, Family Man, Brotherhood of Man, Sacred Man, and Working Man. These are the areas that a Mindful Man needs the courage to 'see' ⚡

#ServeToLead #LeadersAreReaders #TheMindfulMan #Manhood #Mindfullness #Masculinity #LetsMakeReadingCoolAgain

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The True Gentleman Is God's Servant

 

Meekness is not weakness - it is power under control. As the writer of Proverbs says, "He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city" (16:32). In contrast, the individual who is not gentle is likened to "a city that is broken into and without walls" (Proverbs 25:28).

Gentleness always uses its resources appropriately, unlike the out-of-control emotions that so often are destructive and have no place in your life as a believer 😉💪⚡ #ServeToLead

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Biblical Manhood #10 Manage Anger Well

Anger can play a significant role in all of our lives. With men in particular, though, anger tends to be a major battlefield. And for men who have families and even loved one, anger is too often directed toward the very people that men are called to protect. "A man (or a leader)," said Paul to Timothy, "must not be violent" (1 Timothy 3:3) ✔📖⚡ #ServeToLead #BiblicalManhood #ManageAngerWell

To watch other videos in this series, CLICK THIS HASHTAG > #LEGASIManhood

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Biblical Manhood #4 Must Exercise Self-Control (Part 2)

In the previous video, I said that the fourth characteristic of Biblical manhood is that we must exercise self-control. Here I would like to extend this point by sharing three essential areas that we - as a man - must take care of:

a) Spiritual Stability

b) Emotional Stability

c) Psychological Stability

#ServeToLead #GodlyMan #MustExerciseSelfControl #LEGASIManhood

To watch other videos on #BiblicalManhood CLICK HERE:

1) Becoming A Leader https://youtu.be/s67p9D4jeQc

2) Having A Good Reputation https://youtu.be/cKNTiWard6U

3) Must Be A Faithful Man https://youtu.be/hDOw_gO62PM

4) Must Exercise Self-Control https://youtu.be/2c2k9FBpOvk

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Womanhood: A Woman Is... by Erlinda Mikal

I agree! A woman highest calling is fear of the Lord. Perhaps the most famous passage about Biblical Womanhood, Proverbs 31 teaches that a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised (verse 30)

I asked my friend, Erlinda Mikal, a wife, a mother, and a teacher, to share with LEGASI.tv, in her opinion, what are the five (5) virtues of a woman. Check it out ⚡

[P. s: What about man? Ask her husband, Albert Macewell. To watch 5 Vital Characteristics of A Man, CLICK HERE: https://youtu.be/Z3BO98x58d8] 

#ServeToLead #Womanhood #GrowingLeader #FearOfTheLord #EmpoweredWomen #SeekWisdon

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Lima (5) Punca Krisis Dalam Kepimpinan

Dalam temu bual LEGASI.tv (S.1 E.8) bersama Eddy Weerence, dia menerangkan apakah lima sebab utama punca krisis dalam kepimpinan dan menyatakan beberapa karakteristik seorang pemimpin. Selain itu, dia juga ada berkongsi tentang pengalaman peribadi dia sendiri - kesilapan dan kejayaan - dalam memimpin ⚡

Untuk menonton temu bual ini, KLIK DI SINI:

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ATAU YouTube > https://youtu.be/MfU6VQFDN4Y

#ServeToLead #LEGASIInterview #GrowingLeader #PuncaKrisisKepimpinan #KarakterSeorangPemimpin #LeadersAreReaders #DVictorious

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Diet Rehab: 28 Days to Finally Stop Craving the Foods That Make You Fat (2011), Book Review

Diet Rehab: 28 Days to Finally Stop Craving the Foods That Make You Fat (2011) 

by Dr Mike Dow

In March 2010, the Scripps Research Institute release a ground-breaking study (read page 15-16) that find rats who were fed high-fat, high-sugar diets such as bacon and chocolate (lucky rats!) developed full-brown food addictions such as drug addictions. Oh ya, they gave cocaine to the rats too. Amazingly, the food had altered their brain chemistry. Because of this, these rats – overweight and food-addicted – desire for more and more 'junk' food to experience pleasure or at least, just to feel normal. "Now here's the even scarier part," writes Dr Mike, a psychology expert on addictive behaviours, disordered eating and food addictions, "After cocaine-addicted rats stopped taking the drug, it took only 2 days for their brain chemistry to return to normal. For the food-addicted rats in the food study, though, their brain chemistry took 2 weeks to return to normal. In other words, food habits affected their brain MORE than drugs in some ways!" Now, that is scary!

Let me repeat: Food addictions alter brain chemistry the same as cocaine addictions but it took longer for food addictions to recover. Mind-blowing! In this book, Dr Mike focuses on two main brain chemicals that affect our food intakes, body weight and wellbeing, namely - dopamine and serotonin. Dopamine is the pleasure, excitement, 'fall in love' and energizer chemical. If you're low in dopamine, you'll be listless, sad and feel lonely. Concerning food addictions, the more you eat high-fat foods, the more doses of dopamine you'll get to get 'high.' But the more you feed yourself with extra fat, neurons that release, receive and keep your dopamine moving become overloaded, then damaged. Thus, you need greater and greater quantities of dopamine 'junk' foods to feel normal again. This will create a downward spiral cycle of your food addictions. "The more you eat, the more you want." Serotonin, on the other hand, is feeling calm, peaceful and positive chemical. If you're low in serotonin, you'll feel anxious, fearful and perhaps depressed. You'll crave for high-sugary and sweet foods and the vicious cycle of the downward spiral will happen. Your craving for foods is the response of your craving for dopamine and serotonin boosts (among other important brain chemicals). You eat to feel calm when you're nervous, sad or depressed. Weight gain is the by-product.

There are two hallmarks of addiction: 1) Tolerance. "When you keep needing more to get the same high", and 2) Withdrawal. "The pain of giving up an addictive substance that the body has come to rely on." Any diet programs will have to face these two obstacles. And so, Dr Mike introduces his Diet Rehab program. His approach to addiction is based on 'gradual detox' in which "you begin by adding foods that will boost your serotonin and dopamine levels before you even cut back on anything." This is well illustrated in The Dr Oz Show (watch YouTube Dr Mike Dow's 28-Day Plan to Kick Cravings). Gradual detox is based on the understanding that it takes a month (about 28 days) for the human brain to create a habit. So, during Diet Rehab, you need to gradually replace "pitfall" foods, activities and thought patterns with "boosters." There are lots of examples of pitfalls and boosters listed in the book. I love the secret of Diet Rehab because it deals with not only the food that you eat, but also the activities that you do, and the thought patterns that you keep. It can be summed up in two-sentence, says Dr Mike:

1) First add booster foods (more greens and healthy foods) and booster activities (take a walk, exercise, sing, etc.) to your life

2) Then gradually reduce pitfall foods (saturated/trans- fat, high-fat, high-sugar, high-salt, etc.) and pitfall thoughts ("I'm not good enough", "I'm always a failure", etc.)

What I love about this book is that Dr Mike gives good suggestions and science-based reasons for what, why and went we behave in certain ways that are stealing our lives. My favourite is Part 3 entitled Free Yourself from Food Addiction where he talks about obsessive eating, emotional eating and binge eating. This part alone is worth your money and time reading it. I bought this book for only RM10 (on sale) and I learned a great deal about the psychology of food addictions and behaviours and how to overcome them. To be honest, I didn't follow the 28-Day Diet Rehab Programme but I watch carefully what I eat, adding more booster activities and keep my thought patterns in check. If you have an eating disorder or eating emotionally (if chronic, check with your doctor), I highly recommend this book. Dr Mike has dozens of exercises that can help you to understand yourself better and how to deal with it.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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My Morning Routine: How Successful People Start Every Day Inspired (2018) by Benjamin Spall & Michael Xander, Book Review

My Morning Routine: How Successful People Start Every Day Inspired (2018)
by Benjamin Spall & Michael Xander

This book is a paradox of who I am and who I want (to experiment) to be. I'm a night owl. In Daniel Pink's latest book When: The Scientific Secret of Perfect Timing (2018), I'm a classic "owl" even before the rise of social media addiction that ‘creates' more night owls nowadays. The words "morning" and "routine" are two words that I don't feel comfortable with. Morning devotion and morning run are some of the activities that I have tried but never stick to. I need double alarms to ensure that I wake up early if need be such as to catch a flight or early meeting or hiking with my friends. My greatest insight and creativity often appear at around 11.00pm to 3.00am. And the word ‘routine'? Yuck! I'm an INTJ or The Mastermind or The Architect, so, I easily get bored when it comes to routine. I might change or twig it for the sake of improvement but probably do no good since I'm going to abandon it when it becomes rigid. So, why I read My Morning Routine? Well, because it doesn't say My Early Morning Routine. My morning can be 10.00am and I still can learn from this book.

"The way you spend your morning has an outsized effect on the rest of your day," write the authors. I agree. "The choices we make during the first hour or so of our morning determines whether we have productivity and peace of mind for the rest of the day, or whether it will clobber us over the head." Regardless of whether you're an early bird or a late riser, our ‘morning' starts when we wake up. That first hour or so upon waking up is the most crucial period. "Your morning sets the stage for the rest of your day." Knowing this fact, I find that this book is immensely important for me even though I hate the words ‘morning' and ‘routine.' For this book, Benjamin and Michael, founders of mymorningroutine.com, interviews 64 of today's most successful people such as Biz Stone, Arianna Huffington, Marie Kondo, General Stanley McChrystal, and three of my favorite authors, Maria Konnikova, Austin Kleon (most creative interview reply) and Ryan Holiday about their morning routines. At the end of every chapter, there are Over to You section where they offer advice on creating a custom routine of our own. They give very helpful tips and suggestions that we can try to suit our personality, profession, and preference.

I appreciate their desire to show as many examples of morning routines from different people and background but I have to admit that the questions (and most answers) are repetitive. At least for me, repetitive is equal to boring. So instead of selecting 5-9 individuals for each chapter, why not just 3 and then write remarks or notes for any variations and other ideas. However, I love the intro and Over to You section in every chapter. The illustrations are awesome too! Well done Elisabeth Fosslien! Here are my 5 takeaways ‘routine' that either I've implemented all along and need some modification or new ones that I like to try and improve over time:

#1 Make Your Bed. "Making your bed in the morning is one of the simplest things you can do to help wake up your mind and gets you ready and prepared for the day ahead. It also reduces your chances of climbing back into it." I always, always make sure – however busy or rushing – that I make my bed. I feel incomplete and messy if I don't do it. If I do, I feel a small achievement where I start my day with a task completed. Come to think about it, this is probably my most consistent habit (I recommend reading Admiral William H. McRaven's Make Your Bed).

#2 Don't Check Your Social Media (and Email) First Thing in the Morning. "For most of us, checking our email or social media accounts first thing in the morning spell disaster for our early morning productivity… When you check your email first thing upon waking, you're stressing your brain by jolting yourself awake to the realities of the day ahead." I can tell you that I've mastered the art of not checking email early morning. Email is the worst form of communication if you want to communicate with me. But social media is another story. About one year ago, I'm very addicted to social media. So, I counter that bad behavior with digital sabbath or technology detox. Every Sunday, I will off (with very few exceptions) my data from morning to 6.00pm and I always put my phone on plane mode when I'm about to sleep. These habits make sure that I'm proactive instead of reactive to the needs of others. "Be proactive in the morning, not reactive. You'll still be getting emails when you're dead."

#3 Have a Morning Stretching. "Working out is akin to doing a good deed for your body and making an investment in your future health. Not only does working out have positive physical effects, but it should also be valued as a meditative exercise that can help bring comfort and clarity to your day every morning." As a night owl, I don't do active workouts like Zumba or running early morning. I do, however, have simple stretching exercises and half-jog down and up the stairs while waiting for the water to boil to prepare my coffee. I normally exercise in the evening for walking, running and weight liftings.

#4 Get Enough Sleep. "Most of us require between 7 and 9 hours of sleep a night. Of the several hundred people we have interviewed about their morning routines, their sleep times have averaged out at 7 hours and 29 minutes per night… If you're consistently trying to get by on less than 7 hours of sleep it will catch up with you, likely sooner rather than later." For my body (I've tested it), I need 7-8 hours of sleep for optimum mind, body and soul well-being. Right after wake up, before having my morning coffee, I make sure I drink 2-3 glasses of water to rehydrate and refresh my body. Good quality sleep helps me to focus, increase productivity, lessen stress and reduce my pimples (smile). "Getting enough sleep is the best productivity hack I know," writes Dan Counsell.

#5 Read Book Before Going to Sleep and Upon Waking Up – and Listen to Podcast or Audiobook Too. In the book, there is a chapter on Morning Meditation. I don't do meditation early in the morning. I daydream, that's what I do! But when I realized that there are many forms of meditation, perhaps, when I read a book early in the morning – inspirational books and sometimes the Bible – I do engage in some kind of meditation. I don't believe in emptying your mind (can you do that?) but I wholehearted believe that you must fill your mind with empowering, positive and uplifting words (that's Biblical). Besides reading in the toilet or on my bed for at least half an hour, I also love to listen to a podcast while I'm cleaning the room, sweeping or mopping the floor and preparing for my coffee and breakfast.

…but some other days, I don’t do all or any of these 5 ‘routines’ (except for Make Your Bed and drink coffee). Manuel Lima rightly notes: “Routines are like any set of rules. They can be helpful in giving up a sense of constancy, but at times, breaking them can be extremely liberating. Being a slave to a single routine can prevent spontaneity and unexpected discoveries.” Amen.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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8 Lessons I Learned from Captain Marvel (No #7 Is the Cutest One)

I don’t watch movies as much I do last year. I think that movie ticket nowadays is quite expensive (in comparison to the second-hand book, of course. I bought The Last Lecture, CLICK HERE for RM10 only). Although I make three exceptions: #1 If someone wants to sponsor me a free ticket, then I’ll go; #2 Family time or dating by watching a movie is worth the investment, and #3 If the movie ticket is RM10 or below. Oh, maybe I should add another one… if its Marvel or DC movie, without exception, I go for the first-day screening! I was excited for Captain Marvel and I’m not disappointed by the storyline and good acting. The challenge for Caption Marvel is that people will always try to compare it with other Marvel movies (fairly so) and thus, some people dislike Captain Marvel because it doesn’t achieve their expectations (again, fairly so). In my opinion, you got to watch it because it is a good movie on its own and in order for you get the most of The Avengers: Endgame this coming April 2019 (P.s: Wait for the Captain Marvel first end credit).

Okay, since I say that movie ticket is getting expensive nowadays, it is a waste of money if I only watch it for the sake of entertainment. I want to treat it as I would reading books. I’m a learner and I want to learn from movies too. So, here are Eight (8) Lessons that I Learned from Captain Marvel a.k.a. Binary a.k.a. Warbird a.k.a. Carol Susan Jane Danvers:

Lesson #1 Don’t Suppress Your Emotions, Control It. At the beginning of this movie, Vers (named by the Kree, taken from the last 3 words of her name, Dan-vers), suffers from recurring mysterious nightmares. So she meets Yon-Rogg, Vers' mentor and commander of Starforce, to talk about it and train with her. Yon-Rogg trains her to control her abilities and emotions. “You have to let go of the past,” Yon-Rogg advice Vers. “But I don’t remember my past,” she replied. “Control it,” Yon urges her. The Supreme Intelligence, an artificial intelligence, and ruler of the Kree, also urges Vers to keep her emotions in check. Later in the movie, you’ll realize that the reason they ask her to control her emotion is that she might release the great power within her. Actually, what they do is they want Vers to suppress her power. The link between emotion and power can be negative or positive. By suppressing your emotion like anger, it will destroy you internally. It will eat you alive. Anger, on the other hand, can be a good emotion if kept under control. I’m angry with Bible illiteracy among young people today, so I teach Bible Study. I’m angry with false and negative blog articles on social media, so I write inspiring and motivational blog articles. Suppressed your emotions and you’ll lose your power. Control your emotions, and you're in power.

Lesson #2 Your Memory Helps Make You Who You Are. During a mission to rescue an undercover Kree from a group of Skrulls (alien shapeshifters) with whom the Kree are at war, Vers is captured by Skrull commander, Talos. While the Skrull scientists subjected Vers to a memory probe, they found out that her memory is strange and unlike normal Kree. They wanted to find out about Dr. Wendy Lawson, but in turn, they jolted Vers’ memory of the past. It turns out that, Vers was brainwashed by the Kree. “I have this power, but I don’t know where it came from,” she once recalled. When Vers escapes in a pod and crashes in Los Angeles, she makes friend with Nick Fury. In one of the scenes, Vers tells Fury (please don’t call him ‘Nick’!), “I keep having these memories. I see flashes. I think I had a life here, but I can’t tell if it’s real... Something in my past is the key to all of this.” Yes, something in the past, the memory that we have, is what makes us who we are. Memory plays a vital role in every aspect of our lives. It provides us with a sense of self and makes up our continual experience of life. Although the memory can be distorted (I read about it somewhere), nevertheless, memory influence the way we make decisions, the way we see things and perceive events in our lives. The rule to a better life is simple but often neglected: Makes good memory.

Lesson #3 The Power of I Am. When Vers and Fury meet former pilot Maria Rambeau, Vers’ best friend, gradually Vers’ memory comes back to her. Vers discovers her real name is Carol Danvers. Talos, the Skrull commander (who they found out is actually a friend, not a foe), plays the recovered black box from Lawson's plane, prompting Danvers to regain her memories and remember the day of the crash. “I AM Carol,” Danvers realizes, “not Vers.” When she knows who she is and what she is capable of, she finally knows her purpose. She was an aimless soldier but now she is a determined hero. The Kree lies to her. Yon-Rogg lies to her. The Supreme Intelligent lies to her. So her aim is to destroy her enemies (and saved the oppressed). During Danvers intense conversations with the Supreme after she was captured by the Krees, she is able to destroy an implant that was suppressing her powers, gaining full access to all her abilities. How she did it? By denying the lies that people put in her mind and accepting her true self that come from the heart. “I AM Carol, not Vers.” And then she glows! The immense power radiate from within her. Awesome! Who are you?

Lesson #4 True Freedom Is When You Know the Truth (Not by Running from It). This is easy to explain. The desire for Danvers to know the truth about herself is what makes her discover true freedom. But to gain this freedom you need to want it. Franklin Roosevelt once said, “In the truest sense, freedom cannot be bestowed; it must be achieved.” Truth is a vital element for true freedom. “The truth will set you free” but first, it will hurt you. Don’t run from it… run to it. Know the truth about yourself. You never know, just like how Danvers finds freedom for herself and at the same time fight for the Skrull’s freedom, you too might help and inspire others to find theirs’.

Lesson #5 Your Power Is A Part of You. After watching the black box video from Lawson’s plane, Danvers’ memory triggered and she suddenly remembers the day of the crash when Lawson, a renegade Kree scientist who want to help the Krulls, died at Yon-Rogg's hands. When Danvers attempting to destroy the engine's energy-core before Yon-Rogg gets it, she pulled the trigger toward the energy-core and causes it to explode! During the explosion, Danvers flew away and at the same time absorbing the energy from the core and losing her memories. That’s how she gets the power. Since then, the power is a part of her. The Supreme Intelligent masquerades as Dr. Wendy Lawson (Mar-Vell? Let’s stick with the movie version okay) says to Danvers, “Your life began the day it nearly ended. We found you with no memory. We made you one of us so you could live longer, stronger, superior. You were reborn.” That’s half-bullshit, half-true. No matter how what or why Danvers gets her power, the power is part of her. When Yon-Rogg asks her to fight one-on-one without power, our Captain Marvel just blast Yon-Rogg with a photon blast and coolly says, “I don’t have to prove myself to you… I’m kind of done with you telling me what I can’t do.” Yes! She doesn’t have to separate her power with who she is. Whatever talents, gifts, and advantages that you have, it’s part of you and uses it without apology!

Lesson #6 Even Hero Needs Friends. Even Carol Danvers, Captain Marvel, one of the most powerful characters in the Marvel universe, needs friends, a team – Nick Fury, Phil Coulson, Maria Rambeau, Talos, and Goose! If you want to make a change in the world, you need help. No-one makes a significant impact without people supporting and encouraging them. Unless you’re more powerful than Danvers, you need friends too.

Lesson #7 Do Not Despise the Small Thing (or Cat is A Dangerous Animal). Goose a.k.a. Cutest Little Thing a.k.a. Cool Cat a.k.a. Stowaway a.k.a. Flerken Kitty is not your normal cat. Fury petting Lawson’s cat, “Aren’t you the cutest little thing! Aren’t you cute? And what’s your name?” The cat didn’t answer. Carol Danvers called him, “Fury.” “Hmmm?” She indicates they need to go, and so Fury says to the cat, “I’ll be back.” Little that they know that this cat is an alien Flerken with a pocket dimension inside its body that can swallow the Tesseract and the one responsible for scratching Fury's left eye and permanently blinding him (funny). Small characters, small things, small events, small beginnings, small actions can cause big things to happen. Never underestimate the power of, “Think Big. Start Small. Go Deep.” Inside the small thing, there is a pocket dimension!

Lesson #8 Help Is Only… One Call Away. In the last scene Avengers: Infinity War, Thanos wiped out half the universe that includes Nick Fury. Fury, however, had time to page Carol Danvers. In the first post credit of Captain Marvel, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner, and James Rhodes are monitoring the pager in which Danvers appears in the scene. “I'm only one call away,” sang Charlie Puth, “I'll be there to save the day.” I’m not sure about call now and you get help now. I’m sure about this: If you ask for help (or better, if you keep asking for help) soon or later, you’ll get the help that you need. My teacher once said to me: “You are never strong enough that you don't need help.” Ask. Call. Page.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

John C. Maxwell on Leadership #9 Disciplined Emotions

People have just two choices when it comes to their emotions: they can master their emotions or be mastered by them. That doesn’t mean that to be a good team player, you have to turn off your feelings. But it does mean that you shouldn’t let your feelings prevent you from doing what you should or drive you to do things you shouldn’t.

A classic example of what can happen when a person doesn’t discipline his emotions can be seen in the life of golf legend Bobby Jones. Like today’s Tiger Woods, Jones was a golf prodigy. He began playing in 1907 at age 5. By age 12, he was scoring below par, an accomplishment most golfers don’t achieve in a lifetime of playing the game. At age 14, he qualified for the U.S. Amateur Championship. But Jones didn’t win the event. His problem can be best described by the nickname he acquired: “club thrower.” Jones often lost his temper – and his ability to play well.

An older golfer who Jones called Grandpa Bart advised the young man, “You’ll never win until you can control that temper of yours.” Jones took his advice and began working to discipline his emotions. At age 21, Jones blossomed and went on to be one of the greatest golfers in history, retiring at age 28 after winning the grand slam of golf. Grandpa Bart’s advice comment sums up the situation: “Bobby was 14 when he mastered the game of golf, but he was 21 when he mastered himself.”

[Taken from The 17 Essential Qualities of a Team Player: Becoming the Kind of Person Every Team Wants (2007) by John C. Maxwell. Published by Thomas Nelson Inc.]

Have you mastered your emotions?

Or are you mastered by them?

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

John C. Maxwell on Leadership #6 Feelings Follow Thinking

The human mind has a tremendous amount of power in our lives. That which holds our attention determines our actions. Because of that, where we are today is the result of the dominating thoughts in our minds. And the way we think determines what our attitudes are. The good news is that you and I can change that. You can control your thoughts, and because of that, you can control your attitude.

Let’s do an experiment that will show you what I mean. Take a moment to think about the place where you live. No problem. You decided to think about it, and you did it. Next, imagine for a moment that the place where you live has burned to the ground, and everything in it is gone. What kind of emotional response did you have? Maybe you were sad because many irreplaceable things would have been lost in a fire. Maybe you were happy because your current living situation is terrible and a fresh start would do you good. The point is that your thinking prompts your emotion. That’s key, and here’s why:

Major premise: We can control our thoughts.

Minor premise: Our feelings come from our thoughts.

Therefore: We can control our feelings by changing how we think.

Why is that important? Because your attitude is your emotional approach to life. It’s the framework through which you see events, other people, even yourself. That’s why I believe the saying, “You are not what you think you are, but what you think... you are.”

[Taken from The Difference Maker: Making Your Attitude Your Greatest Asset (2006) by John C. Maxwell. Published by Thomas Nelson]

How are the dominating thoughts of your mind affecting

your attitude and effectiveness as a leader?

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Jesus on Prayer: Don't Babble, Just Talk Honestly, Come Boldly and Open Your Heart

“When you pray, don’t babble on and on as people of other religions do. They think their prayers are answered merely by repeating their words again and again. Don’t be like them, for your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him!”

(Matthew 6:7-8, NLT).

After discussing hypocrisy (refer to Matthew 6:5-6), Jesus next pointed to the practise of “other religions” and highlighted another truth about prayer. To “babble on and on” is to repeat the same words over and over, like a magic incantation. Many pagan worshipers believed that saying certain words and phrases and repeating them often would help them get through to their gods.

Jesus wasn’t belittling prayer or even the idea of being persistent in prayer, something that he would later encourage his disciples to do (Luke 18:1-8). And the prayer that Jesus taught his disciples has been repeated by church congregations and individual believers for twenty centuries. Instead, Jesus condemned the shallow repetition of words by those who don’t have a personal relationship with God and who are not thinking about what they are saying. Prayer isn’t magic, like waving a wand and saying “Abracadabra,” and God doesn’t offer secret formulas for us to use. Prayer is communication, one person talking to another. As this passage shows us, God is more interested in our hearts (our focus and motives) than our words. He wants us to approach him with openness, honesty, and sincerity, engaging our minds and emotions.

Think about this: Believers should come to God as to their loving Father, sincerely bringing specific needs. This statement that “the Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him” doesn’t excuse believers from praying; it’s just that we don’t have to spend a long time reciting our needs. God doesn’t need our prayers, but he wants our prayers and knows that we need them. God knows you inside-out: thoughts, feelings, relationships, conflicts, dreams, anxieties, hopes, and needs. As your loving Father, he cares about you, his child. And as his child, you can approach your Father at anytime and anywhere, coming boldly into his presence (Hebrews 4:16). Open your heart to him. Amen.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Kem Meyer's Advice for Me on Blogging

As communications director for Granger Community Church, Kem Meyer spends her time finding creative ways to clear the clutter that keeps people from engaging. She’s not afraid to break marketing rules and change how people think the “church” is supposed to interact with the world. In Brian Bailey’s book The Blogging Church (John Wiley & Sons, Inc: 2007), Kem writes about blogging that encourage me so much – especially in the area of what to write –  and I hope it will have the same positive effect on you too:

“What is the thing you are most passionate about? The situation you can’t walk by without doing something about it? The subject matter you can’t seem to get enough of? The thoughts filling your mind that keep you up at night and wake you up in the morning? The thing you are most knowledgeable about, have the most experience with, or the most discontent? What solicits your heightened opinion, frustration and joy? What problem are you seeking the solution for? The spot you keep going back to again and again through every season?

Blog about that.

If you do, your content will be authentic, emotional, purpose-driven, and engaging. Posts will be natural, unmanufactured, original, and inspired. Your blogging will be a spontaneous extension of your life. It won’t ever be a chore. Readers know where to find you and you will engage their interest. The hardest thing for you will be knowing how and where to stop once you start. Avoid clichés and soapbox at all costs to remain trustworthy. If you ramble, you will be your only audience and the significance will be lost.”

I hope this words will encourage to you to start blogging now (or to write blog again)

Let’s blog for the Glory of God. Amen.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

You Are a Person, Not a Stereotype

People are more relax and joyful when they allow their individual personality to come out, not when they conform to popular images. Men who believe they must act tough and women who believe they must act soft are boxed into a set of expectations that have nothing to do with who they are.

Take for example, during my grandmother’s funeral, generality I observed that most women crying and men stand still with emotionless faces. Men have been taught to be tough, not to reveal their emotions. Women on the other hand, have been taught to be more open, more expressive. I read a studies that says with both physical and emotional pain, men are much less likely than women to reveal their discomfort.

It is important to remember, though, that not all of us fit those social expectations. I think, a man who wants to cry at a funeral for example, but stops himself because he is been taught to be tough is not really being tough. He is pretending to be what he thinks people expect of him. A woman who forces herself to open up in front of others but who would rather act more reserved is not a nicer person for showing her emotions and will not be happier for having to act in the way that is unnatural to her.

When I sing worship songs during church service or read the passion of Christ in the Scripture, sometime I would burst to tear. When friends share about their stories, I feel their pain. When people make fun of Jesus and His Word, I will be angry. I used to think that being tough is being emotionless guy. But most of the time I tend to fall into that state. I need to learn to be more like Jesus. I’m still learning now. Jesus cried, Jesus angered and Jesus was moved with compassion. He is the Man of men, don’t you think we ought to follow the person of Jesus as our example of personality too? I think we should.

You have to act the way you think appropriate with self-control, not the way you think the average man or woman supposed to act. Our generalisations about men and women are often false and too often damaging. You are a person, not a stereotype. To be a person that God want you to be, it is not found in connection of how well men and women should fit into gender stereotypes of femininity and masculinity, but in connection with our personal relationship with God. In the end, that is all matter in life.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Jesus was so Human

“Jesus wept” (John 11:35, ESV)

No doubt we are right when we said that Jesus is the Son of God. When he said “I Am” or “The Father and I are one” or “Whoever has seen me has seen the Father” or “I am in the Father and the Father is in me” – he is claiming to be equal with God. He was God. But if we examine the life of Jesus, we find a fascinating contrast. To be equal with God is to be more than human. Yet, in his life, he appears to be very much an ordinary man, displaying thoroughly human characters and behaviour.

There was a time, for example, when children were brought to him for blessing. The disciples tried to send them away (perhaps they were very tired that day), but Jesus welcomed them, took them in his arms, and blessed them (read Mark 10:13-16). And on another occasion, when the disciples asked him who was the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven, Jesus replied by taking a child as an illustration and saying: “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:3, ESV).

Not only did he enjoy natural human activities such as the company of children, he also experienced the same physical weaknesses that we all know so well. In the New Testament, we find him tired after walking on a journey and resting for a while by a well (John 4:5-6); he was hungry after going without food for 40 days (Matthew 4:2); and thirsty as he was dying hung on the cross (John 19:28); he became exhausted by a long campaign of preaching and teaching – and to my amazement, on one occasion, he actually fell asleep in the back of a boat, and (more amazement!) managed to sleep through a violent storm (Mark 4:35-38). Jesus was so human.

He also experienced every human emotion too. He knew the joy of celebration and was happy to be a guest at a wedding (John 2:1-11); he was angry with the corruptions in the temple (John 2:13-22) and he knew the sadness of losing a close friend, and was not ashamed to weep openly at the grave (John 11:33-36). He, this I like, felt great compassion for people in their need; whether it was for a crowd “because they were like sheep without a shepherd” (Mark 6:34), or for an individual such as the rich man whose wealth kept him from finding eternal life – we are told that Jesus “looking at him, loved him” (Mark 10:21). Jesus was so human. He, I believe, is still a man even today (Read the Book of Revelation if you don’t believe me). Jesus is – the Son of Man.

Do you know that Jesus is not only the Son of God, but also the Son of Man?

That He is both fully God and fully man? (Seek the Scripture)

Do you know Jesus of the Bible?

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Be Imitator of the Divine Emotions

"When Jesus cleared the temple of the moneychangers and animal-sellers, He showed great emotion and anger. Jesus’ emotion was described as “zeal” for God’s house (John 2:17). His anger was pure and completely justified because at its root was concern for God’s holiness and worship" (GotQuestion.Org)

Control your feelings. By ‘control’ I don’t mean suppressing your feelings. To blow up with anger is clearly as wrong as to keep your anger inside. Implosion (I just learned this word) from the inside is as much harmful as explosion of emotions. I like how David Matthew defines self-control; it is to “bring our emotions to a place of proper balance in our lives just like Jesus”. Question, how on earth can we do this?

One of the ways is by imitating the Divine emotions. Imitate our heavenly Father, who long for His children to be like Him. After explaining on how to live as God’s children of light, Apostle Paul writes, “Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are his dear children” (Ephesians 5:1, NLT). If you read and very familiar with the Scripture, you will find that God the Father is active in showing His emotions of love which reaches out and takes the initiative; His righteous anger burns against sin and injustice; His compassion toward the weak and helpless; His sadness over men’s hard-heartedness and refusal to repent. All these and more – we should cultivate the same emotions like Him.

Paul also writes, “Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God” (Ephesians 5:2). He said follow, copy or imitate also Christ. Look at the Scripture you will find Jesus’ godly emotions shown such as wept at a graveside (so can you); denounced hypocrisy with a holy passion for God’s glory (so can you); expressed genuine love towards those who desire to follow Him (so can you) and more. All these examples we ought to imitate. Mind you, friends, as a man, Jesus was the manliest of all men and His emotional life was rich. Imitate Him with confidence.

In dealing with your emotions and as Children of light,
the Scripture said, “Imitate God” and follow the “example of Christ”, okay?

God’s Holy Spirit be with you. Amen.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.