The Notebook: A Novel (1996) by Nicholas Sparks, Book Review

 The Notebook: A Novel (1996) by Nicholas Sparks

I love reading romantic novels by Sparks since A Walk to Remember. I’m not saying that novel is my favorite genre or I’ve read every book by him (I heard his latest novel, The Wish, is very good) but those that I do read, I love them all. Like one of the reviews said, Sparks “generates authentic emotional power.” I say, he always sparked the emo in me. I enjoy watching the movie too. Ryan Gosling as Noah, Rachel McAdams as Allie, and other cast members acted very well and almost as good as I imagined the novel could be. But, like many readers who watched their favorite novel turn into movie adaptation would say - the novel is better. There is… more. Only true readers will understand why. I’ve created the scenes in my mind. I’ve invested my precious time and emotions in the story. I’ve made some of the words, conflicts, and thoughts mine (or read mine into them). When the story so gripped you, someday you will wonder, as you forget that you have read it somewhere before, are these memories belong to me or someone else? Or a mix of both like cocktails? Whatever it is, you will hold tight to the sweet ones but the sad ones will always haunt you. Yet, the memories never let you stop believing what’s possible. That's what love does.

Truth be told, The Notebook is a bit cliche and in case you forget that it’s a fictional story - some of the details are unrealistic. When I first read it many years ago, I can very much figure out how it will end. But what makes me always come back to Nicholas Sparks’s novels (I’ve read Message In a Bottle, Safe Haven & The Best of Me too) is because he is very good with words - lyrically romantic, a gifted storyteller, and heart-touching genius. Let me quote one short paragraph among many that I’ve underlines like a textbook. A dialog. Hope this can encourage you to read The Notebook for yourself. This is what Noah said to Allie when she asked him to pick one moment he remember most from the summer they spent together:

“Poets often describe love as an emotion that we can’t control, one that overwhelms logic and common sense. That’s what it was like for me. I didn’t plan on falling in love with you, and I doubt if you planned on falling in love with me. But once we met, it was clear that neither of us could control what was happening to us. We fell in love, despite our differences, and once we did, something rare and beautiful was created. For me, love like that has happened only once, and that’s why every minute we spent together has been seared in my memory. I’ll never forget a single moment of it" ❤☺

#ServeToLead #LeadersAreReaders #LeadersReadNovelToo #NicholasSparks #TheNotebook #LetsMakeReadingCoolAgain

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THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Angelus' Quote: Unfriend Your Ex After Break Up

It has been said to "Always follow your heart" and it can be true sometimes. But when it comes to matters of the heart (I'm talking about emotion) listening to your head (logic) can save you a lot of pain. Listen to me - both as heart-breaker and as the heart that has been broken - please UNFRIEND your ex. It might don't make sense now; You might think that it's harmless; Perhaps you want to act kind or maybe you just don't have the gut to do it... Take a deep breath, let go of whatever confusing emotions you have right now, go to your ex's profile - UNFRIEND!

Why? In today's world, social networking is like living in a virtual world, and there are times when your virtual world and real world intersect. When it comes to relationships, all too often the virtual and real world are at odds. If you want to really let go, then please include let them go from your virtual world too. If you still keep your ex in your friend lists, it will make the hurt deeper, longer, harder to let go, make you feel insecure and negative (imagine you see your ex with someone new, then you'll think to yourself, "What's wrong with me?" "Am I not good enough?" "Is he/she happier without me?" and all sort of imaginary questions).

Don't be overconfident by saying, "No problem, we just gonna be normal friends" or "The past is the past, it won't affect me anymore." Unless you do not really love your ex before, these foolish talks are self-deceiving talks! You're not a robot, you're an emotional being. The reasonable thing to do is to UNFRIEND your ex. Plus, what if in the future you (thought you) already move on and found someone new, what if he or she finds out that you still connected with (or secretly 'stalking') your ex? I tell you, he or she will be mad and break up with you! Then, you neither have one or the other. So, don't be overconfident. Emotionally, this might be hard for you to do, I understand. But in a long-term, logically, this is the wisest thing to do. Listen to me: UNFRIEND your ex, Now!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Book Review: A Walk to Remember (1999) by Nicholas Sparks

A Walk to Remember (1999) by Nicholas Sparks

First, I fall in love with Mandy Moore in the movie; then, with this book. I read this novel for the third time already. I love the characters, simple storyline – and personality of Jamie Sullivan. Landon Carter, bad-boy-turned-sentimental, retelling the story of how he falls for Jamie, the shy-mysterious-lovely girl, “This is my story; I promise to leave nothing out. First, you will smile, and then you will cry – don’t say you haven’t been warned.”

Smile, I do. Cry? Not so, but feel the grief and the frustration that every character felt, especially Landon. I put myself in Landon’s shoes (well, as bad-boy I was, maybe is?), how I slowly getting to know Jamie up close – her struggles, her sweetness, her shyness when with people and her fun-side when she’s with kids, her secret.

My favorite part:

“’Do you love me?' I asked her. She smiled. 'Yes.' 'Do you want me to be happy?' as I asked her this I felt my heart beginning to race. 'Of course I do.' 'Will you do something for me then?' She looked away, sadness crossing her features. 'I don't know if I can anymore.' she said. 'But if you could, would you?' I cannot adequately describe the intensity of what I was feeling at that moment. Love, anger, sadness, hope, and fear, whirling together sharpened by the nervousness I was feeling. Jamie looked at me curiously and my breaths became shallower. Suddenly I knew that I'd never felt as strongly for another person as I did at that moment. As I returned her gaze, this simple realization made me wish for the millionth time that I could make all this go away. Had it been possible, I would have traded my life for hers. I wanted to tell her my thoughts, but the sound of her voice suddenly silenced the emotions inside me.

'Yes' she finally said, her voice weak yet somehow still full of promise. 'I would.' Finally getting control of myself I kissed her again, then brought my hand to her face, gently running my fingers over her cheek. I marveled at the softness of her skin, the gentleness I saw in her eyes. Even now she was perfect. My throat began to tighten again, but as I said, I knew what I had to do. Since I had to accept that it was not within my power to cure her, what I wanted to do was give her something that she'd wanted. It was what my heart had been telling me to do all along. Jamie, I understood then, had already given me the answer I'd been searching for, the answer my heart needed to find. She'd told me outside Mr. Jenkins's office, the night we'd asked him about doing the play.

I smiled softly, and she returned my affection with a slight squeeze of my hand, as if trusting me in what I was about to do. Encouraged, I leaned closer and took a deep breath. When I exhaled, these were the words that flowed with my breath. 'Will you marry me?”

This is a classic love story, the best of Nicholas Spark in my opinion. Read the novel, watch the movie… You’ll fall in love again…

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

I Post this for My Prettiest Friend

Prettiest Friend

By Jason Mraz

This is what I look like today
And I'm trying not to pull out my hair
I'm trying not to show it 'cause I'm far too shy to grow it back there
That's probably why I like wearing hats
There's no denying I'm deferring the facts
Avoiding confrontation
Lacks tact in a situation
Behind every line is a lesson yet to learn

But if you ask me
The feeling that I'm feeling is overwhelming
And oh, it goes to show
I've so much to know

I wrote this for my prettiest friend
Who while trying not to prove that I care
Trying not to make all my moves in one motion and scare her away
Well she can't see she's making me crazy now
I don't believe she knows she's amazing how
She has me holding my breathe
So I'd never guess that I'm a none such unsuitable, suited for her

But if you ask me
The feeling that I'm feeling is complimentary
And oh, it goes to show
The moral of the story is boy loves girl
And so on the way that it unfolds is yet to be told

I know that I should be brave
Even pretty can be seen by the blind
I know that I cannot wait
Until the day we finally learn how to find each other
Redefining open minds

And if you ask me
The feeling that I'm feeling is overjoyed
And it's golden, it goes to show then
The ending of this song should be left alone
And so on 'cause the way it unfolds is yet to be told

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Never take Relationship for Granted, Express Affection Every Day

“[Each] man must love his wife as he loves himself,

and the wife must respect her husband” (Ephesians 5:33, NLT)

Dr. Nathaniel Branden is a California psychologist whose advice about marriage has appeared in several national magazines. When couples come to him asking, “Are there specific ways in which couples who remain happily in love behave differently from couples who don’t?” Branden says, “Yes!” He points out that couples who stay in love never take their relationship for granted, but they express their affection for each other every day in various ways. In his article on Reader’s Digest entitled ‘Advice That Could Save Your Marriage’, he writes (summaries):

·        They frequently say “I love you”

·        They are physically affectionate, holding hands, hugging, cuddling

·        They express their love sexually

·        They verbalize their appreciation and admiration

·        They share their thoughts and feelings, learning to self-disclose what’s on their minds and hearts to each other, confiding in each other

·        They express their love materially, giving little gifts to each other

·        They create time alone together

“Marriage are made in heaven,
but we are responsible for the maintenance work”

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Dear Alice, Aja-aja Fighting!

Dear Alice,

How are you? That is a formal question that everyone seems to be asking around whenever they meet one another. How are you? is not necessary replied by details – but simply, ‘okay’. I’m not asking that kind of how are you? but How are you? Really, how are you?

But my question is quite stupid, right? I know you’re not alright but still asking the obvious… How are you? Maybe that’s what a lover ask when he know that his love one is not alright. I become worry; I then become stupid; stupidly in love with you.

 

Alice, in these few days I been wondering, why you always went to hospital for medical checkup. I asked, but you said it is not the right time for me to know about it. So I try to find out for myself. I make a call to hospital and asked favor from my friend-doctor about you. I know he shouldn’t tell me about this but I said to him that you’re my love one. You know, I make a promise with the doctor that I won’t tell anyone about this but I break a promise with you that I have to do this without your acknowledgment and permission. I have to do it… I’m worry and stupid, remember?

Alice, now that I know about it. I know what and why is happening now. Alice – don’t quit! You’re a strong woman. The Lord is with you. Remember what I said, “aja-aja fighting!” Alice, there is hope. There is hope today. There is hope tomorrow.

There’s hope for tomorrow

Even when things look dim;

There’s hope for tomorrow

When you put your trust in Him.

Though darkness may surround you

He’s always there

With arms that will hold you

In His loving care.

Just when you thought

You had lost everything,

He’s right there beside you

With comfort to bring.

And you’ll know the assurance

He will never depart,

For He’s dwelling inside you

Right there in your heart.

Don’t quit. There is hope. God is with you.

Regards,

Richard Angelus

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

Nota Ringkas tentang Cinta Romantik

“Segala sesuatu di dunia ini berlaku pada waktu yang ditentukan Allah... waktu untuk berasmara dan waktu untuk menahan diri” (Pengkhutbah 3:1, 5)

Cinta romantik. Cinta romantik ialah bahasa cinta yang membawa kepada keintiman antara satu dengan yang lain (jiwangnya aku ini). Alangkah indahnya perasaan itu apabila seseorang yang kita cintai menyatakan bahawa dia sayang kamu, dia menghargai masa bersama kamu dan dia betul-betul telah jatuh cinta kepada kamu. Kamu akan merasa yakin, dihargai dan dunia ini seakan-akan milik kamu... senyum, bersemangat, indah.

Pernah kamu merasa begini? Dulu? Sekarang? Belum lagi? Walau apa pun kita semua mengingini hubungan yang intim, cinta romantik. Jangan malu untuk mengakui keinginan kamu untuk memiliki cinta ini – Tuhan mencipta kita untuk mempunyai hubungan antara satu sama lain termasuk hubungan intim. Keinginan itu telah ditanam ke dalam hati setiap insan, dan ia hanya akan ‘menyinar’ dengan indah sekali apabila hubungan itu diikat melalui tali perkahwinan. Tuhan yang mencipta hubungan romantik, jadi ia bukanlah sesuatu yang tidak baik melainkan jika kita menyalahgunakannya.

Bagi kamu yang masih bujang lagi (seperti saya buat masa sekarang), saya ada soalan untuk kamu: Sejauh mana kamu mengingini hubungan romantik? Adakah kamu betul-betul mengingininya sehinggakan kamu sangguh bersama dengan sesiapa sahaja walaupun ia melanggar perintah Tuhan Allah dan bertentangan dengan ajaran Al-Kitab?

Begini, hubungan intim, cinta romantik dengan seseorang selalunya terjadi pada masa kamu tidak menyedarinya. Ia berlaku apabila kamu tidak terlampau memikirkannya. Ia selalunya berputik, bermula daripada persahabatan. Dan cinta bagi orang Kristian harus bertumbuh melalui perhubungan iman, berkongsi pengalaman hidup dan mempunyai matlamat sama iaitu untuk bertumbuh dalam kasih Yesus Kristus dan melayani Tuhan Allah seumurhidup bersama-sama.

Oleh itu, jalinlah hubungan persahabatan dengan penuh ikhlas, tidak kira samada dengan lelaki atau perempuan dan teruslah melayani Yesus dimana sahaja kamu berada (jangan terlalu fokus atau risau untuk mencari teman wanita atau teman lelaki). Ingat: walau apa pun kita ada Tuhan Yesus, teman sejati, yang selalu mencintai kita. Ingat juga bahawa “segala sesuatu di dunia ini berlaku pada waktu yang ditentukan Allah...” waktu untuk menunggu si dia dan waktu untuk cinta romantik.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

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Nota: Namun begitu, mungkin ada diantara kamu telah dipanggil untuk melayani Tuhan Allah sepenuh masa dan kamu akan tetap membujang seumur hidup. Ini ada kebenaran bagi kamu; Yesus Kristus tidak pernah mempunyai hubungan romantik dan tidak berkahwin... namun Dia tetap Anak Manusia yang paling sempurna sekali. Rasul Paulus hidup membujang sampai mati... namun Tuhan Allah telah menggunakan hidupnya dengan luar biasa sekali. Kamu tetap sempurna dan lebih lagi boleh melayani Yesus dengan hebat sekali walaupun kamu tidak mempunyai teman hidup. Bersuka-citalah!

My Straightforward Counsel to Young Christian Boys and Girls (especially): Don’t Date Non-Believers

I know a girl who had grown up in a Christian family and attended church activities faithfully. She wasn’t that pretty, to be honest, but she had a tremendous singing talent and an inner love for Christ – that what make her attractive. She was everyone favourite’s girl. Everybody loved her, but she longed for a romantic relationship with a boy. Well, she told everyone on her Facebook post. Not long after that, my friends told me that they began noticing that she always absent from many of the church activities. When she did come, they said, she was not the same joyful girl as she was. Her dress and outward appearance slowly began to change too. 

One day my girl friends told me that she had been to a social club every Friday night around town area with someone. When I talked to her about it, she admitted that she been dating a non-Christian boy. ‘He is the only one who really understands me’, she said. ‘He would take me out and treat me well. I love him, Richard...’. Obviously, my advice was no match with her undying love for this boy. My friends had tried to reason with her about her love-interests with non-Christian boy, but she hardened her heart like Pharaoh'.

Few months later, came to our surprise, she announced that she was marrying the non-Christian boy and converted to other religion. She said that God would understand her action and asked us not to judge her. ‘I love him, stop lecture me!’ she ended our friendship.

About 1 year later, I heard that the girl went through some hard times and emotional pain. She was not happy. One day, the boy finally walked out of her life for good; divorced her for someone else. Since then, I lost contact with her. As far as I know, she has never come back to the Lord. I hope that the ‘rumours’ is not true.

 ‘What happened to her?’ I often asked the Lord and myself this question. I think that she wanted a boy so badly that she was willing to pay any price to have her fleshly desire fulfilled. It began slowly by turning away from God’s people to hang out with godless people. This is common scenario that is happening to many young college Christians students in Malaysia.

As a brother (I’m old enough I guess) and as a fellow Christian, I want to advise you: it is very important that the people you choose to date are Christians. You may know someone you would really like to date who is a non-Christian, but don’t! Remember this (I learned from my senior), one of the purposes for dating is to get to know someone in a way that can lead to engagement and soon marriage. Many people I knew personally had gone ahead and dated a non-Christian saying thoughtlessly, ‘Richard, we’re not going to get married! Relax la bro; I won’t be converted to (fill the blank).We’re just dating, no big deal’. In the end, in most cases, it leads to tragedy and curse. I want to warn you earlier. More importantly, God wants to spare you.

Friend, your fellowship with Jesus is disrupted when you violate God’s command and date a non-Christian. Dating a non-Christian is sin (but friendship with non-Christian is not a problem. In fact, it's trully loving). ‘How dare you say something like that Richard?!’ you may respond. I tell you; I’m afraid actually, but I dare to tell the truth. God makes that clear throughout the Bible. For example, ‘Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? …how can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?’ (2 Corinthians 6:14-15NLT; see also Deuteronomy 7:1-4).

Dating, my friend, should provide a mutual sharing on the deepest spiritual level. This is where intimacy really takes place. (I learned from my older mentor. Thank you taiko!) Rick Wilkerson wonderfully writes,

"The fulfilment in friendship – or a dating relationship – comes as two people come together in Christ to share laughter, tears, caring, and sharing based around their mutual relationship with Jesus. Only there will you find a sense of belonging and the companionship you need. Your relationship with God must come first. When it is right, the Lord can lead you into wonderful, exciting, fulfilling friendships and dating. God truly does want the very best for you".

Good summary, don't you think?
God want the very best for you.
Don't date a non-Christian.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

First Love

“Gus says to Noah, ‘My daddy used to tell me ‘the first time you fall in love it changes your life forever, and no matter how hard you try, the feelin’ never goes away. This girl you been tellin’ me about was your first love. And no matter what you do, she’ll stay with you forever.’” (Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook)

She has dark-brown, small and lovely eyes. Her hair is long, blackish, curl at the end – when the wind blows, it moves like a soft gentle wave. There is a mole on her face that sparkling her sweet-cute-little nose. She is tall, taller than I am. Her body figure is perfect as her shadow under the bright morning sun; slim and wonderfully made. Beautiful. Her skin tone radiates her Asian look.
I never touch it, just looking from a distance. I wonder, could a man so lucky to hold her hand, so fortunate to kiss her lips, and so privileged to let her head rested on his chest. I envy those who win her heart before. It breaks my heart when those males never appreciate the angel that was in front of them. When she speaks, all the noises don’t matter anymore. When she called my name, my heart melted like a vanilla chocolate ice cream. Sweet remains, but warm instead of cold.

 “Oh my”, I said to myself the first time I saw her innocent face. She was holding her textbooks, hair tied behind, walked slowly into the library, “I’m in love… God, I can’t move.” I was stuck on my chair. Her smile was like a magnet that absorbs all my being, her gestures made slow-motion in my mind. “I’m in love, oh… I’m in love.” Since then, I resolve to be her guidance angel. To admire her from afar, to protect her from others that want to take advantage of her – to kill the mocking birds around her, if I could; but for sure, to pray for her safety and well-being when she is out of my radar. “I’m in love,” I declared, “I’m in love”.

………………………………………………..

This is the story of my first love in college. Quite details but not all, I keep the rest of the story to myself. You can tease me when you meet me, I won’t be offended. Or smile, I won’t hide. I would appreciate your interest in the matter. I love to recall it over and over again. It gives me hope, excitement, and honestly saying – it never fails to bring a smile to my face. The memories are God’s hidden treasure for me.

How about you? Seriously, have you ever fallen in love? Do you remember how it feels the first time you saw him or her walk by? You remember, do you? Love, first love, is a feeling you feel when you have a feeling you’ve never felt before. Here is the point in my talk (or writing) about love today: Never give up on love. No one is perfect until you fall in love with someone. Your love story is not gonna end if your first love died or is gone before your eyes – you have to move on, never give up. Grief, loss, betrays may chase your love away for a moment but not permanence. Take heart, my friends. This ancient quote may be helpful for you; “Love is a fabric which never fades, no matter how often it is washed in the waters of adversity and grief.” Stand up on your feet; there’s hope for you to discover… a love story that is yet to be written on the pages of your memory.

...Learn to fall in love again

...Never give up on love

It is said: One's first love is always perfect until one meets one's second love...

Kristen Stewart* once testified about her first love, “Everybody says the first cut is the deepest. It’s so true. I don’t know if it’s because it’s the best love, but it’s the first that you remember. There is one boy that I will remember for the rest of my life, and I wouldn’t go as far as to say, ‘Oh I was in love with him and he broke my heart’. You hold on to that, just that first experience, it’s good to have and you should appreciate it, even if it hurts.”

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

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Reference:

*Quote from: http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/first-love