Dear Annabel,
Divorce is often compared to death because the grief is
similar to what one feels when someone has died. But of course, that statement
is over rated. One thing is sure though, it’s okay for you to cry… Crying, as
you know, is a natural way to deal with losses. And divorce – the ending of your
family as you know it – is a huge loss.
Cry, I and your aunty are here for you. Crying is not a form of weakness. If you
think crying is not cool, then think again. Crying helps you express your emotions
and acts as a release valve to let go of the awful sadness and pain that builds
up inside you. You will almost always feel better after you have cried. In John
11:35, when our Lord Jesus felt sad about the death of his friend Lazarus, he “wept.” Even Jesus shed tears when He
feels sad and angry. Ah, I know, Bel, you may prefer to be alone when you cry…
you may feel embarrassed… but don’t be ashamed to cry in front of us or your
parents and friends. If they really care about you, it’s a great way to let
them know that you need support.
You will feel better, I promise. It might not happen
tomorrow or next week or even next month, but eventually you will become
comfortable with your new life as a person with divorced parents. Going through
a divorce is like experiencing a bad weather. First you notice black clouds,
then the sky gets darker and darker… then rain and strong wind. You’re frightened,
and you feel like the whole world is coming apart. Then guess what? Everything
will change! The clouds will disappear, the wind dies down, the sky bright and
the sun shines again. No matter how bad the storm is, the sun will always shine
after it is gone. You’ll be fine. In fact, you’ll be stronger!
Dear child, this is my
prayer to you:
“The Lord bless you and keep you;
the Lord make his face shine on you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn his face toward you
and give you peace” (Numbers 26:24-26)
love,
Angelus
THINK BIG.
START SMALL. GO DEEP.
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