Timothy, Tell the Children to Take Care of Their Parents (1 Timothy 5:3-8)

 “Honor widows who are truly widows. But if a widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show godliness to their own household and to make some return to their parents, for this is pleasing in the sight of God. She who is truly a widow, left all alone, has set her hope on God and continues in supplications and prayers night and day, but she who is self-indulgent is dead even while she lives. Command these things as well, so that they may be without reproach. But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worst than an unbeliever.”

(1 Timothy 5:3-8, ESV)

The bottom line of 1 Timothy 5:3-16 as I understand it is this: God’s people, namely the church, is to help to supply not just spiritual needs but also material needs of other vulnerable Christians (for example here, the “widows”) if there are no other believing family members to do so. But if there are, then, they ought to provide the needs by all means. What Paul writes here concerning care for widows can be applied to any Christians in real need. But one thing we must keep in mind, however, the church is not a welfare agency. The church is not to put social work before the gospel of the grace of God. Beware of the damnable social gospel nowadays! The church is to take responsibility to care for those who are really in need only when there are no other Christian family members to do so (I’m repeating myself here to emphasize the point!). “Let the church not be burdened,” reminds Paul later, “so that it may care for those who are truly widows” (v.16). The qualifications of widows to be supported are listed in verses 9 and 10. Spiritually, they are the godly widows who set their “hope on God and continues in supplications and prayers night and day” NOT those who are “self-indulgent” or “live only for pleasure” (NLT), that is, the ungodly.

First moral responsibility is placed upon Christian relatives (“children or grandchildren” or any family members) at least because of these five reasons: 1) To show one’s “godliness”, 2) To repay or “to make some return” to one’s parents or grandparents. To “honor” is to show “respect” (the fifth commandment in Exodus 20:12), 3) To please God. “This is pleasing in the sight of God”; 4) To affirm one’s faith because if not he or she “has denied the faith and is worst than an unbeliever”, and, 5) To unburdened the church (v.16). It is sad that sometimes even Christians who have been loved and cared for by their parents or grandparents, practically turn their backs on them in their hour of need. The dramas on Malaysian TV series and films on Netflix about how the children argue with one another on who will take care of their elderly parents or the decision to send their parents to old folks' homes are the reflections of what really happened in our culture today. How come one mother can take care of ten children all by herself but her children can’t take care of their only mother? Such children - or probably YOU - need to hear these words all over again: “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worst than an unbeliever.” Strong words, yes, but the truth is always is!

To read previous short articles on 1 Timothy, CLICK HERE 

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Children Are Watching YOU!

I was sitting with a group of mothers in the kitchen during my cousin's wedding. I got to get away from the heavy noises and went for a coffee. I overheard one of the mothers said, "I don't know how to tell my daughter to stop playing with her phone and study for the exam." And then I observe, she always holding her phone while complaining about her daughter. It's like an alcoholic father telling his son to be a good man. How irony.

"There is nothing more influential in a child's life than the moral power of a quiet example," reminds William J. Bennett. "For children to take morality seriously, they must see adults who take morality seriously" ���⚡��� #ServeToLead #LeadingByExample #ChildrenDoWhatChildrenSee

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If It Isn't True, Forget It, and Go On and Serve the Lord

Not all criticism is wrong. Sometimes, if we let go of our ego (hard, right?), it can be a great lesson in life. If it's true, you have the chance to improve yourself. It is our responsibility to amend our mistakes and sins. For the Lord's sake. If it's half-true, perhaps you need to see the bigger picture or delay your response, for the one who pointed it out to you might be misunderstood.

If it's false in your good conscience, then do what H.A. Ironside said: "forget it and go on serve the Lord." Nobody who serves the Lord wholeheartedly will be immune to criticism. Therefore, don't let it discourage you - rejoice! - and don't take matters into your own hands. Romans 12:19 reminds, "Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, 'Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord'" ��������� #ServeToLead #PreachTheWord #GoOnServeTheLord

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The Duties of Parents (2010, first published 1888) by J. C. Ryle, Book Review

 The Duties of Parents (2010, first published 1888) by J. C. Ryle

My parents are good but not saints; as far as I can remember, they never taught me about Christ and the Word directly but I remember they (especially mom) taught me to pray before a meal and went to bed; I believe they want the best for me but in our culture, best mean mediocrity. I don't blame them, they just follow the examples from their own parents, grandparents, and so on. I never regret having them as my parents (although, I once imagined that I'm the prince of the King of England!) but I decide, by God's grace, to make a difference for my future children. You should too. Change must start with us. Bishop J.C. Ryle (1816-1900), of which his seven volumes of Expository Thoughts on the Gospels I owned, open this short book with the famous verse from Proverbs 22:6, "Train up a child in the way he should go - and when he is old, he will not depart from it." If the crisis of ungodliness among young people during Ryle's time was alarming as he mentions in the book, then, surely today has become worse. In my observation, the responsibility to "train up a child" that is supposed to begin at home has ended up mostly left to the school, the church (if any), and even social media. This is not supposed to be so for Proverb 22:6 assumes that it is the responsibility of the parents or the close guardian(s) of "a child" to give godly instructions and to train him or her to walk with God. Ryle explains: "The plain truth is, the Lord's commandment in our text is not regarded - and therefore the Lord's promise in our text is not fulfilled." Don't make excuses, just obey the Word of God and you will be blessed. Here are Ryle's seventeen (17) insights of biblical responsibility of child-rearing that he outlines in this book:

1. If you train your children rightly, train them in the way they should go, and not in the way they would
2. Train Up your child with all tenderness, affection, and patience
3. Train your children with an abiding persuasion on your mind that much depends upon you
4. Train with this thought continually before your eyes – that the soul of your child is the first thing to be considered
5. Train your child to a knowledge of the Bible
6. Train them to a habit of prayer
7. Train them to habits of diligence, and regularity about public means of grace
8. Train them to a habit of faith
9. Train them to a habit of obedience
10. Train them to a habit of always speaking the truth
11. Train them to a habit of always redeeming the time
12. Train them with a constant fear of overindulgence
13. Train them remembering continually how God trains His children
14. Train them remembering continually the influence of your own example
15. Train them remembering continually the power of sin
16. Train them remembering continually the promises of Scripture
17. Train them, lastly, with continual prayer for a blessing on all you do

#ServeToLead #PreachTheWord #JCRyle #GodlyParentsGodlyChildren #NoExcuseJustObey #LeadersAreReaders #GrowingLeaders #LetsMakeReadingCoolAgain

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Worship the Lord in the Midst of Your Responsibilities on Monday

"Praise the Lord! Praise, O servants of the Lord, praise the name of the Lord! Blessed be the name of the Lord from this time forth and forevermore! From the rising of the sun to its setting, the name of the Lord is to be praised!" (Psalms 113:1-3, ESV) #ServeToLead #PreachTheWord #WorshipOnMonday

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We Must Obey God Rather Than Men

 

Peter (and the other apostles) was not being disrespectful to the religious leaders when he said this 👇 In fact, in 1 Peter 2:13-17, he encourages us to submit to authority and human government "for the Lord's sake." But when their rules go against the faith, it is undoubtful that we should obey God first and foremost rather than fear and bow to men. Be a good citizen, even more, be a better Christian. Where are men with godly conviction nowadays?

Martin Luther, defending himself against German princes and Roman Catholic priests, said, "My cause shall be commended to the Lord for He lives and reigns who preserved the three children* in the furnace of the Babylonian king. If He is unwilling to preserve me, my life is a small thing compared with Christ. Expect anything of me except flight or recantation. I will not flee, much less recant. So may the Lord Jesus strengthen me." He did not say "deliver me" ❌ or "make it easy for me" ❌ He said "strengthen me" ✅ And he concluded his response with the words, "Here I stand, I can do no other. So help me God" ➕ #ServeToLead #FearGodNotMen

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Leaders: Exercise Control Without Being Controlling (#GrowingLeader)

 

In the past, I learned this lesson the hard way: Leaders are responsible FOR people without taking responsibility FROM them 😉🔥✔ #GrowingLeader #ServeToLead

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Take Responsibility For Your Life

[3:10mins] Taking responsibility puts you at the choice and that allows you to choose how to respond to life’s challenges. You move from being a victim to a possible victor. You change your mindset from "My life is like this because of them" to "I must take responsibility for my life." Stop blaming! #ServeToLead #GrowingLeader #TakeResponsibilityForYourLife

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A Leader as Brother's Keeper

When God asked Cain, in Genesis 4, "Where is your brother?" Cain replied, "I don't know... Am I my brother's keeper?" (v.9). Is Cain Abel's keeper? Of course! By blood, cause he is his brother; by authority, cause he is the oldest, firstborn; and by spirituality, cause he should be the example. As a leader, how can you be a brother's keeper? #ServeToLead #GrowingLeader #SpiritualLeader #MyBrothersKeeper #LeadershipBible

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Leaders, Take 100% Responsibility

After The Fall, Adam's and Eve's eyes were opened. They suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. When God asked Adam, "Where are you?" and inquired more, he said, "It was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit, and I ate it." Then, God asked Eve, "What have you done?" "The serpent deceived me," she replied, "that's why I ate it." God was not asking a curious-question, He asked an accountability-question, and they - as most of us would have done - blame one another!

Instead of taking responsibility, Adam, the man who God puts in charge of everything - a leader - shift blame to others. What can we learn from this story? Why as leaders we must take 100% responsibility? #ServeToLead #GrowingLeader #LeadershipBible

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Good Leader Initiates

A good leader initiates. God, the Greatest Leader, always take initiative. He creates the universe (Genesis 1-2), redeems humanity, came into the world. Because we are created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27) and to "rule" (1:28) a.k.a. to lead (a.k.a. to serve) under Him, we too must initiate 😉💪📖 #ServeToLead #GrowingLeader

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As A Man Thinketh #5 No Victimized Mindset, Take Responsibility

“A person is buffeted by circumstances so long as he believes himself to be the creature of outside conditions”

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

One of the great weaknesses of our society today is the growing attitude of victimization. Many people claim themselves to be victims of some outside force. “I don’t know the story of the Bible because my pastor doesn’t teach me…”; “If that driver hadn’t pulled out in front of me…”; “I am like this because of my parents…”

When we are victims of circumstances, or as James Allen says, a “creature of outside conditions,” we have no power. We have given over the power in our life to the circumstances. The longer we give power to our circumstances the worst our circumstances become. In his other book, Above Life’s Turmoil, Allen writes, “You imagine your circumstances as being separate from yourself, but they are intimately related to your thought world. Nothing appears without an adequate cause.”

To get control of our circumstances we must first acknowledge personal responsibility for being where we are. That was the hardest part for me because the ‘victim’ in all of us doesn’t want to take that responsibility.

When we take responsibility, we must then take control of our thoughts. And, yes, in the beginning, that can be hard. It seems sometimes that it’s our nature to first think negatively. But that’s just because it’s the habit we’ve developed. And like any habit, it can change by replacing it with the habit of thinking the right way.

Emmet Fox once writes: “You are not happy because you are well. You are well because you are happy. You are not depressed because the trouble has come to you, but trouble has come because you are depressed. You can change your thoughts and feelings, and then the outer things will change to correspond, and indeed there is no other way of working.” Think about it!

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References:

1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen

12 Rules for Life #6 Set Your House In Perfect Order Before You Criticize the World (Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“Don’t blame capitalism, the radical left, or the iniquity of your enemies. Don’t reorganize the state until you have ordered your own experience. Have some humility. If you cannot bring peace to your household, how dare you try to rule a city?”

(Jordan Peterson)

Wherever we look, we see many abnormalities and a lot of things to complain about said Peterson. It’s true that life is tragic – for most people at least – and surely there is malevolence. However, if we dwell on it too long, it is of no benefit at all since we become more and more resentful. Cursing and criticizing all the time is pointless and we should start taking more meaningful actions.

First of all, we have to correct ourselves. Being busy with criticizing society all the time makes you neglect yourself and you ignore that you may be similar to what you are despising. So, take good care of yourself first, stop doing anything that you know to be wrong and start doing and saying only things that make you proud. The first step is to bring peace to your (own) household and after that, you can criticize the government and country (in Malaysia) and attempt to contribute to change the society you are living in for the best. This reminds me of Mother Teresa's words, “If each of us would only sweep our own doorstep, the whole world would be clean.”

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12 Rules for Life #2 Treat Yourself Like Someone You Are Responsible for Helping (Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“We deserve some respect. You deserve some respect. You are important to other people, as much as to yourself. You have some vital role to play in the unfolding destiny of the world. You are, therefore, morally obliged to take care of yourself. You should take care of, help and be good to yourself the same way you would take care of, help and be good to someone you loved and valued. You may, therefore, have to conduct yourself habitually in a manner that allows you some respect for your own Being…”

(Jordan B. Peterson)

Peterson states the fact how most people have self-contempt and there are many times that they don’t even realize it. In fact, on most occasions, people take care of their family, friends and even their pets but neglect their own self. Of course, helping those you love and care about and take some responsibilities on behalf of them is very good, but we must realize that we must do the same thing for ourselves – for our own good too. Carl Jung, the founder of analytical psychology, points out that “to ‘love one’s neighbor as thyself’ one must have some degree of self-love and self-care attached.” This may be something simple such as having self-respect and considering ourselves an important person with potentials, rights, and desires.

Besides, the more we look after ourselves the healthier and powerful we’ll be to support the ones we care about. On the contrary, if we neglect ourselves then we’ll make a pattern of bad mistakes. Thus, our life will get worse not only for us but for the people around us too. A person’s actions echo sometimes in ways that cannot be imagined. An example may be Stalin's mother whose mistakes created ripple effects that affected millions of people (read Chapter 2 to know more).

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Angelus' Quote: We Are In Charge of Our Attitudes

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past; we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one thing we have and that is our ATTITUDE 😇

Chuck Swindoll said I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you, we are in charge of our attitudes 😉 #GrowingLeader #ServeToLead

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Angelus' Quote: Get this Les Brown's Hunger Recipe!

"When you want something so badly that you refuse to let go, you will probably get it," says Les Brown, my favorite motivational speaker. This is what he called "hunger." Les believes that "when a person gets discouraged, and they will, it takes hunger to develop the courage to try again and again and never quit. Some people are naturally hungry. Others are not hungry enough."

I define "hunger" as a POWERFUL DETERMINATION, almost a consuming fire. When I was rejected by CF due to some outside influence, I cried, but get back up again. When my blog URL was blocked twice this year, I don't give up. When my writing was wrongly accused of causing trouble, I write anyway! I'm HUNGRY! 👇Learn this Les Brown's Hunger Recipe:

1) TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR LIFE 😎 Stop blaming other people and past negative circumstances for where you are. It is up to you to accomplish your dreams

2) READ AND LISTEN 👂😷 Les would say consume inspirational and motivational tapes. I would like to add, read books on your strengths and interest. Listen to audiobooks and podcasts too

3) DEVELOP A SENSE OF URGENCY 🕰 Take actions now that will move you toward your goals

4) GET AROUND SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE 😊 Find out what motivates them. Pick up their attitudes, especially. Include them in step 2)

5) DEVELOP COURAGE 💪 Overcome your fears. Push them aside. Unmask them and then master them

6) CONTEMPLATE YOUR MORTALITY 🙏 Predict the accomplishments you desire to achieve by the end of life. If you die today, are your life fulfilling God's purpose and desire?

7) PUSH YOURSELF 👊 Operate on a massive, relentless scale in order to accomplish your goals

"With a powerful hunger for your dreams driving you," Les believes, "you will be surprised at the ideas that will come, at the people you will be able to attract and at the opportunities that will unfold." You got to be hungry! #GrowingLeader

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