As A Man Thinketh #8 Pain Is Inevitable But Suffering Is Optional

"Suffering is always the effect of wrong thought in some direction. It is an indication that the individual is out of harmony with himself, with the law of his being"

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

Most people associate suffering with pain be it physical, mental and/or spiritual. They assume suffering to be an automatic result of all pain. I used to think like that too. However, suffering is not a result of pain, it is a RESPONSE to pain. Haruki Murakami, a Japanese writer, says: "Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. Say you're running and you think, 'Man, this hurt, I can't take it anymore.' The 'hurt' part is an unavoidable reality, but whether or not you can stand anymore is up to the runner himself." Pain is an unpleasant signal that is warning you that something is wrong. This is normal and good for us. Suffering, however, results from our thinking about the pain. That's why James Allen says, "Suffering is always the effect of wrong thought in some direction."

In his interview with Larry King, Christopher Reeve, legendary actor of Superman movies, talked about a riding accident that left him paralyzed from the shoulders down and dependent on a ventilator. It was obvious that Reeve has endured and continues to endure an incredible amount of pain. However, his response to this pain has been anything but suffering from it. He instead devoted his life to helping others, especially those with paralysis like him. Reeve was a realist but at the same time very positive and inspirational. He says, "My feeling is you have to deal with the reality as it is, but not accept it as permanent. I'm sorry, but I just don't believe there is any reason to give up. The goal is cure. The goal is to get up and out of the wheelchair. And in the meantime, you deal with reality. But if you don't have a vision, nothing happens."

Like Reeve, the 'Man of Steel', we don't have to suffer from our pain – it's our choice. We don't have to be Superman or Superwoman to deal with it. First, change your mind about your suffering. Remember: Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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As A Man Thinketh #7 You Can Choose Your Thoughts

“A person cannot directly choose his circumstances, but he can choose his thoughts, and so indirectly, yet surely, shape his circumstances”

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

In Pam Golden’s book Choose the Happiness Habit, she writes a good illustration for this quote: “Take the story of two brothers who are twins. One grows up to be an alcoholic bum. The other becomes an extremely successful businessman. When the alcoholic is asked why he became a drunk, he replies, ‘My father was a drunk.’ When the successful businessman is asked why he became successful, he says, ‘My father was a drunk.’ Same background. Same upbringing. Very different choice.” The brothers chose different thoughts about the identical experience. Those thoughts over the years shaped the circumstances they now find themselves in. The successful brother chose to view his negative upbringing as a positive motivation to be a better man than his father. He chose his thoughts rightly “and so indirectly, yet surely, shape his circumstances.”

Bob Proctor, author, and motivational speaker, says, “You’re either living in the problem or you’re living in the solution.” Whenever I’m in negative circumstances, I try my best to view them from a positive perspective first. In my mind, I thought: if this is a problem, then I can solve it; if I can’t solve it, then it’s a fact of life. If I can solve it, no matter how hard and long it will be, it will be solved. Then, I shouldn’t worry about it. If it’s a fact of life, I can’t do anything about it, so might as well, it is useless for me to worry about it. There are two empowering thoughts whenever you face a bad circumstance: #1 Be In A Problem-Solving Mode. List down ideas that might be a solution and don’t delay, take action, and #2 Activate Your Learning Mode. Never be so caught up in solving the problem that you missed the lessons. Focus on the possible lessons you might learn from the circumstance.

George Bernard Shaw has this great saying: “People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they can’t find them, make them” …Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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As A Man Thinketh #6 How to Overcome Doubt and Fear

"Thoughts of doubt and fear can never accomplish anything. They always lead to failure"

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

I think it's Napoleon Hill who said: "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." When we spend inordinate amounts of time fearing something or event in the future (not happened yet), many times that which we fear comes upon us. When it does, we wonder why it happens to us, when in reality, we are responsible for the most part for our troubles. It all started with a thought of doubt. Then it causes an emotion of fear, which manifests itself physically as anxiety. Anxiety robs us of our power, energy, and focus. Severe anxiety will not only mess our minds but also undermine our health – and it's all brought on by a thought of doubt. It "can never accomplish anything."

There are three (3) basic ways that help me overcome thoughts of doubt. First, I change my mind about doubt and keep it changed. If I doubt whether I'm going to have enough money to make it to the end of the month, I change my mind about it. When doubt knocks, I pray and affirm to myself that: "God will always provide for me. He is good. And I always find a way to have enough of what I need." Dan Brule advised, "If you are going to doubt anything in life, doubt your limitations."

Secondly, overcome doubt and fear with massive actions. Do the thing you fear and fear will disappear (rhyming, huh?). "Inaction breeds doubt and fear," writes Dale Carnegie, "Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit at home and think about it. go out and get busy." This action-oriented mindset will always work! Trust me. Thirdly, replace fear with faith. Some people say fear and faith cannot co-exist. I disagree. They can co-exist. What's important is which one is greater? If my fear is greater than my faith, it will eventually fail. But if my faith is greater than my fear, success is my inevitable future. Bob Proctor puts it nicely: "Faith and fear demand you believe in something you cannot see. You choose." Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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As A Man Thinketh #5 No Victimized Mindset, Take Responsibility

“A person is buffeted by circumstances so long as he believes himself to be the creature of outside conditions”

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

One of the great weaknesses of our society today is the growing attitude of victimization. Many people claim themselves to be victims of some outside force. “I don’t know the story of the Bible because my pastor doesn’t teach me…”; “If that driver hadn’t pulled out in front of me…”; “I am like this because of my parents…”

When we are victims of circumstances, or as James Allen says, a “creature of outside conditions,” we have no power. We have given over the power in our life to the circumstances. The longer we give power to our circumstances the worst our circumstances become. In his other book, Above Life’s Turmoil, Allen writes, “You imagine your circumstances as being separate from yourself, but they are intimately related to your thought world. Nothing appears without an adequate cause.”

To get control of our circumstances we must first acknowledge personal responsibility for being where we are. That was the hardest part for me because the ‘victim’ in all of us doesn’t want to take that responsibility.

When we take responsibility, we must then take control of our thoughts. And, yes, in the beginning, that can be hard. It seems sometimes that it’s our nature to first think negatively. But that’s just because it’s the habit we’ve developed. And like any habit, it can change by replacing it with the habit of thinking the right way.

Emmet Fox once writes: “You are not happy because you are well. You are well because you are happy. You are not depressed because the trouble has come to you, but trouble has come because you are depressed. You can change your thoughts and feelings, and then the outer things will change to correspond, and indeed there is no other way of working.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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References:

1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen

As A Man Thinketh #4 The Most Basic and Logical Principle

“Good thoughts and actions can never produce bad results; bad thoughts and actions can never produce good results. This is but saying that nothing can come from corn but corn, nothing from nettles but nettles”

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

Most everyone understands the biblical concept of sowing and reaping because we can grasp the simplicity of logic. If we were to plant durian on our farm, we wouldn’t expect apple to come up. But even though we can grasp the logic, we don’t always act as if we understand the power of this principle. And we certainly don’t act as if this principle will affect us.

An example: For many years my morning ritual began with video games (or PSP to be exact). Most mornings spending an hour or more on games and morning news before dashing off the office. I haven't realized then that our minds are most impressionable immediately upon rising in the morning and just before sleep in the evening. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise to me that my sowing of these thoughts would reap an ‘attitude’ at my workplace (impatient, demanding, shouting, etc.).

I gave up my morning ritual seven years ago and replaced it with a habit of reading. I read my Bible or book of the week and on the way to work, I listened to motivational or self-development audiobooks. When I sow “good thoughts” and thus I’ll reap “good results.” The Apostle Paul wrote, “You’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse” (Philippians 4:8, The Message).

We always reap what we sow and that is especially true with our thoughts. As Emmet Fox writes, “The secret of life then is to control your mental states, for if you will do this the rest will follow. To accept sickness, trouble, and failure as unavoidable, and perhaps inevitable, is folly because it is this very acceptance by you that keeps these evils in existence. Man is not limited by his environment. He creates his environments with his beliefs and feelings. To suppose otherwise is like thinking that the tail can wag the dog.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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References:

1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen

As A Man Thinketh #3 Don't Dwell Upon the Mistakes of Yesterday (Move On)

“Do not dwell upon the sins and mistakes of yesterday so exclusively as to have no energy and mind left for living rightly today, and do not think that the sins of yesterday can prevent you from living purely today”

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

It’s been said that the majority of conversations by men over forty are about the past. Sometimes it’s about the ‘good old days’ and sometimes it’s about the deals gone bad, the ‘if I only had’ stories, the missed opportunities, etc.

Letting our “sins and mistakes of yesterday” dominate our thinking today robs us of our present joy and our future happiness. It causes us to miss the opportunity of today! John C. Maxwell, in his outstanding best-seller Failing Forward, gives some great practical advice: “To move forward today, you must learn to say goodbye to yesterday’s hurts, tragedies, and baggage. You can’t build a monument to past problems and fail forward.”

Take time right now to list the negative events from your past that may still be holding you hostage. For each item you list, go through the following exercise:

1)    Acknowledge the pain

2)    Grieve the loss

3)    Forgive the person

4)    Forgive yourself

5)    Determine to release the event and move on

Your best days are definitely ahead of you if you treat your “mistakes” as necessary lessons to be learned. If you understand that each lesson brings with it a certain amount of wisdom, you can understand how truly enhanced your life is becoming. Many people can’t achieve the success of their dreams because they won’t leave their past behind. They won’t tear down the monuments they’ve built to their old hurts and problems. “Don’t dwell upon the sins and mistakes of yesterday.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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References:

1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen

As A Man Thinketh #2 You Are Today Due to the Books that You (or Don't) Read

“People are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves; they therefore remain bound”

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

We spend hundreds of ringgit a year for clothing, cosmetics, body products and other items to change or improve our outward appearance but very little money or time to change our inward condition. Many people easily spend hours a day online, going to gym, playing games, watching series and movies but find every reason in the world not to spend even a few minutes a day to improving their minds.

Since it is our thoughts that determine the life we will have, you must focus on doing those things that will change your thoughts, and nothing is more effective at changing your thoughts than reading the right books. Charlie ‘Tremendous’ Jones writes, “You are today the same you’ll be in five years from now, except for two things: the people you meet and the books you read. The people you meet can’t always be with you, but what you read in books can remain with you a lifetime. How often we hear of individuals who began a new era in their lives from the reading of a single book.”

Are you a book reader? Why not start a new habit today? Spend just 15 minutes every day in the morning or before going to bed or whenever you’re most concentrate and focus. Read from a personal development book or biography of someone you admire (ask me if you want my book suggestions on both topics). At the end of a year you will have read about 12 books – at the end of a five years about 60 books! Through your changed thoughts you will have become much more like the “vision you enthrone in your heart.”

As English writer Aldous Huxley observed, “Every person who knows how to read has it in his power to magnify himself, to multiply the ways in which he exists, to make his life full, significant, and interesting.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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References:

1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen

As A Man Thinketh #1 Don't Limit Your Mind

“A person is limited only by the thoughts that he chooses”

(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

You are not limited to the life you now live. It has been accepted by you as the best you can do at this moment. Any time you’re ready to go beyond the limitations currently in your life, you’re capable of doing that by choosing different thoughts. Don’t limit yourself.

Cynthia Kersey author of Unstoppable writes about this amazing story of George Dantzig. As a college student, George studied very hard and always late into the night. So late that he overslept one morning, arriving 20 minutes late for class. He quickly copied the two maths problems on the board, assuming they were the homework assignment. It took him several days to work through the two problems, but finally, he had a breakthrough and dropped the homework on the professor's desk the next day.

Later, on a Sunday morning, George was awakened at 6 a.m. by his excited professor. Since George was late for class, he hadn't heard the professor announce that the two unsolvable equations on the board were mathematical mind teasers that even Albert Einstein hadn't been able to answer.  But George Dantzig, working without any thoughts of limitation, had solved not one, but two problems that had stumped mathematicians for thousands of years. Simply put, George solved the problems because he didn't know he couldn't.

Bob Proctor tells us to “keep reminding yourself that you have tremendous reservoirs of potential within you, and therefore you are quite capable of doing anything you set your mind to. All you must do is figure out how you can do it, not whether or not you can. And once you have made your mind up to do it, it’s amazing how your mind begins to figure out how.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

 

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References:

1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen
2. Day by Day with James Allen (2003) by Vic Johnson
3. Unstoppable: 45 Powerful Stories of Perseverance and Triumph from People Just Like You (1998) by Cynthia Kersey