Friday, June 3, 2011

Sorry seems to be the Hardest Word

An apology is the superglue of life. It can repair just about anything.” (Lynn Johnston)
An ounce of apology is worth a pound of loneliness.” (Joseph Joubert)
 Saying “I’m sorry” is one of the most difficult words to say. Listening to Elton John feat Blue sing a song titled, “Sorry seems to be the hardest word” make me ponder upon this subject of ApologyIt’s not that to pronoun the word ‘sorry’ is the hardest things to do, I believe that the hardest things is that one requires to realize that he or she need to face it head-on with own fault and to admit it to someone else. My girl friends always say that man is full of ego that’s why they don’t like to apologies, I don’t deny that but not all man is like that. (Most of the time I would reply, “So all girl like color pink?”) Ego or not, as a human being – it’s tough to admit when we are wrong. 

Based on my own experiences and I heard stories from others that I knew personally, we often tempting to pretend the offense never happened. What we do? Well, we do what we mastered at; acting that nothing is happen, try to cover it up and top 3 on the lists is to avoid the person we’ve offended. Agree? Please continue to read ya...

Proud heart, not taking responsibility for our actions and refusing to apologize can be hazardous consequences in our life: sour relationships, tasteless isolation, bitter rage and acidic guilt. I remember ‘taste’d every ounce of it, when I refused to say sorry to someone that I’d wronged.

Proverbs 28:13 make it clear that through an apology we can experience reconciliation, forgiveness and healing. “He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy.” Through words like, “I’m sorry” mix with a sincere heart shows a humble heart. When you admit your faults, realize that you not always right all the time and rather ask for forgiveness, you’ll be glad or perhaps surprise that God will begins to heal your heart. He begins it with you first, and then He will slowly heal your broken relationships around you.

Do you need to utter an apology to your friend, classmate, your boss, your college, or your parent right now? Are you waiting for them to make a move first when obviously it was you who is to blame? Even if not, are you willing to humble yourself and make the first move? I hope you will. Those 2 words of reconciliation I’m sorry” if spoken with a humble heart will almost always get a replied that can make your life full of joy… “I forgive you.”

I write almost always because some may reply it coldly. But this I’m so sure, very sure… super sure… that if you ask for forgiveness from God for all the sins you have done and say,
Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.”

He would commands His angels, 
Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again, he was lost and is found.” (Both quote taken from Luke 15:21-22NIV)

In other words, “You are forgiven.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.

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7 comments:

  1. This is very interesting. But how about,the person realized his/her mistakes,and say "I'm sorry" with casual and carefree actions like it's not his/her fault?It burned a hole in my heart. Who was I kidding? How could I expect a sincere apology from a person who didn’t have a clue what I was talking about?

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  2. Hi there,

    1) how about you examine this statement, "How could I expect a sincere apology..." Should you expect them to say 'I'm sorry' then you'll forgive them? or can you settle with forgiving them first before they utter any word of apology?

    2) "It burned a hole in my heart", Why?

    3) "from a person who didn’t have a clue what I was talking about?"... maybe you're not clear?

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  3. Well actually,I really expect the person to say sorry first because its obviously his/her fault at the first place. (In this matter,cheating.)Its totally hard for me to forgive this person actually.But deep inside my heart,I am trying. Just that I cant stand his/her "too casual" attitude/reaction toward his/her mistakes. It burned a hole in my heart because I care about this person too much,but he/she disappointing me. Please give some advice for me.:)

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  4. Hi Anonymous,

    Since we cannot change others, it is wise for us to change ourselves. We may tell them about this and that, you'd done this and that to me, and I feel this and that about this issue... but in the end it's up to the other person to react about it.

    Make it possible for you to examine what are the things that you'd missed seeing in this process. Malay proverb says, "Tepuk sebelah tangan takkan berbunyi."

    Examine also what you have learn about yourself.

    And my advice is: "Forgive all you can, Give Mercy all you can and Apologize all you can."

    Ya know what? "care about this person too much" is too much. Care for someone means let them be who they are. Care doesn't means you want them to be what you expect them to be. Care for someone is not equal to "I know what is right, trust me, I care". Care is equal to let go, let them choose and tell the truth but not force to believe.

    Let go and let God...
    You apologize and forgive, let them choose to do the same...
    Tell them what the Word says about reconciliation and forgiveness, but don't force them to believe...

    Oh how much in peace you will be if you care about Jesus too much and less about him and yourself. :) My 2 cents... :)

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  5. Hi Richard,

    I appreciate your concern and advice about this matter. Really, I couldn't see those at the first place,it was only full of hatred feelings, but now I know.It should come from me first.:) Truly agree with you,brother. Will learn from it. Jesus shouldn't come second to those people we put first. Thanks a lot,brother! Bless ya.;)

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  6. 5 years ago, me n my uni's friends...we went to the sme church back at kuching. so one day, this vry funny guy talked to me aft the church servic...not rly talked 8tually but he kind of whispering..(i think) but since i'm a bit pekak ckit..i hardly hear he says it.then i just say "yEs"...n nex minute i saw him goin out frm e church..aft bout 30 min...we all went out..n i saw him waitin ther wif his very "lain mcm" air muka laa..until now, i nvr know wht he said tht day or why did he waited for me outsde e church.i wish i can talked to him n if it rly my fault, i will say sorry bt im scared..bcos of this few things : 1. one years knowin him mke me feel like i fall for him (FYI i still love him evn aftr 5 years n he have girlfrien) 2. i cnt evn say HI to him aft i confess my feelin to him. 3. i am really mad at him cos he didnt say anythin like "sorry, i cant accept u cos i don love u"..all he said is "its okay,i've been there n i know how it feel to love my own friend" 4. is becos he brought his girlfren to church that same week after i told him tht i love him-i am really8x mad...5. is bcos im no longer who i am..evn tho i wnted so muxx to change my life.no more alchol, no more playin around, no more lie...no more bad habits..i hope i can somehow meet him again to say im sorry evn tho i dont know why i shud say sorry to him. 6. thinkin of him, peepin his FB acc makes me feel so much to change myself. I wish i can turn back my life...i dont mind if u dont rply to tz..i just wnt to release all the things i hv in my heart..its hurt...really hurt evn after 5 years...i try so hard to forget him...but it is remembering him tht mkes me live evn till now..he meant a lot to me..evn tho i meant nothng to him..richard..thanxx for creating thz blog...

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  7. Thank you for sharing this Anonymous :)

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