Men's Dirty Little Secret: Pornography

As I listened to The All-American Rejects song called Dirty Little Secret on my mp3 player, it sparked my mind to one of the most destroying secret men ever struggle with – pornography. Quite numbers of men are sitting on that secret. Pornography is the ‘dirty little secret’ few wish to talk about. We hope that people won’t know (but actual we know) So now let's talk about it, briefly~

Pornography has always been a favorite pastime of many young men everywhere. In fact, someone that I know personally told me it was a ‘normal’ thing to do. Unfortunately, it is spreading quickly into the private lives of men and women. I know you’ll not be too surprise if I say that it happen also in our Christian community. 

“The truth is,” writes Jeff Olson, “that a multitude of Christian men, young and old, and from all walks of life, regularly looked at pornography. Not all men who have looked at pornography are addicted to it, but many are. And anyone who takes a casual peek or even accidentally runs across it is in danger of getting hooked.”

Men are not alone in facing this issue…

What is Pornography?

My dictionary defines pornography as ‘the depiction of erotic behavior, as in pictures or writing, intended to rouse sexual excitement. It involves such things as books, photographs and film – all depicting erotic behavior intended to cause sexual excitement.” What makes material pornographic is its main intent is to cause/rouse sexual excitement.

The rise of Pornography

Pornography is highly profitable industry and furthermore, it is widely available. The growth of its use is faster than our KLIA Ekspres train (metaphorically speaking). Today, those with access to the Internet no longer need to worry about having not enough ‘stocks’. With a click of the mouse; students, employees, husbands and even children can download many sexually graphic pictures and sex videos – easy to find, easy access, and easy to get. This ‘acceptable’ entertainment is even being shown over television, cable systems and in movies.

[My friends and I once offered by a young entrepreneur selling X-rated movies while we were eating at coffee shop. That’s what we called – direct-selling!]

The Dangers of Pornography

Here are some of the dangers listed by Dr. James Dobson (summaries mine) on his January 1986 Focus on the Family newsletter entitled, “Combating the Darkness”;

1.     Depictions of violence against women are related to violence against women everywhere. “Violent pornography also contributes to the so-called “rape-myth,” leading men to believe that women really want to be abused even when they vigorously deny it.” 

2.     The use of pornography seems to be addictive and progressive in nature. “…those who get hooked on sexually explicit material tend to become obsessed by their need.”

3.     The river of obscenity which floods our homes has reached the eyes and ears of children! “…viewing their parents’ x-rated videos and magazines… also being bombarded by vile lyrics in rock music on radio, television and videos.”

4.     Pornography is degrading and humiliating to women. “They are shown being beaten, hanged from trees, smeared with feces, urinated upon, and, of course, deprived of dignity and modesty… the entire female gender has reason to feel used and abused by this industry.” 

In short, pornography destroying to society, degrading to women, damaging to marriages and destructive to users!

“Flee from sexual immorality”

Men are aroused visually. Wild imaginations and wicked fantasies are our expertise. Jeff Olson explained it well when he writes, “God had wired men to be sexually aroused by sight. In a matter of seconds, a man can shift from feeling no sexual arousal to full sexual arousal because he is stimulated primary by what he sees.” There are many more factors that contribute men to fall into the bait of pornography, but this I foresee is the main reason behind our failure. Keep away from anything that may lead you into sexual immorality.

“Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18-20ESV)

God in the Bible command us to “flee from sexually immorality”. The words “flee”, pheugate, mean ‘to run away’, ‘to shun’. Albert Barnes notes, “This is a sin where a man is safe only when he flies; free from pollution only when he refuses to entertain a thought of it; secure when he seeks a victory by flight, and a conquest by retreat. Let a man turn away from it without reflection on it and he is safe.” Feeding your sexual appetite with pornography can only lead to incredible temptation by Satan. Plus, your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. “You were bought with a price” that is by the Blood of Jesus Christ. So keep it holy by ‘flee’ from pornography!

“How can a young man keep his way pure?”

Temptation is not sin. “Yielding to temptation is sin”, writes Rick Wilkerson, “The Lord has always promised us that temptation will never be so strong we can’t overcome it.” Here is a word of advice: Don’t entertain the garbage of pornography, instead fill it with the truth of God’s Word.  Psalmist asked a question,

“How can a young man keep his way pure?” (Psalms 119:9)

How can a Christian men and women flee from this destructive behavior?
How can we keep our way pure from this sinful desire?

“By guarding it according to your [God's] word.” (.11ESV)

 THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.