The Leader In You: How to Win Friends, Influence
People and Success In a Changing World (1993) by Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc. with Stuart R. Levine
& Michael A. Crom
If you already read Dale
Carnegie's masterwork How to Win Friends
and Influence People (originally published in 1936), you'll find that this
book is repetitive only with clearer examples, simpler chapters and modern
touch. If you just read How to Win Friends
and Influence People say, about less than 6 months ago, I think you don't
have to read this one. But for me, the last time I read Dale Carnegie's book
(including How to Stop Worrying and Start
Living) was about 3-4 years ago, so this is a good refresher for me because
I forget some of the key lessons that he taught. Reading The Leader In You is fun and beneficial for me because this year my
focus is on leadership, one of my subject of interests. Although I've read
dozens of leadership books, I still can learn greatly from this one. As Dale
Carnegie writes, "Keep your mind open to change all the time.
Welcome it. Court it. It is only by examining and re-examining your opinions
and ideas that you can progress." How true.
This book is published by
Pocket Books, a division of Simon & Schuster, Inc. and as expected, it is
pocket-size, only 230+ pages and 16 short chapters with Carnegie's quote at the
beginning and a key lesson for each leadership principles. Dale Carnegie begins
the introduction of The Leader In You
by explaining that as the 21st-century approaches, the world is undergoing
enormous change, and so "the
human-relations revolution," a cultural change is here where "a whole new breed of leaders" is
required. What the world needs is not hierarchical and bossy ways of leadership,
today all the more, we need leaders who mastered the human-relations
principles. "What needed is
leadership, to help people achieve what they are capable of, to establish a
vision of the future, to encourage, to coach and mentor, and to establish and
maintain successful relationships."
Let me highlight briefly 5 Human-Relations-Leadership Principles
(there are 16) with my favourite quotes:
#1 Finding the Leader In You. "Leadership
is never easy. But thankfully, something else is also true: Every one of us has
the potential to be a leader every day." Key lesson: The first step
toward success is identifying your leadership strengths.
#2 Starting to Communicate. Here are the first steps to successful
communication: 1) Make communication a top priority; 2) Be open to other
people, and 3) Create a receptive environment for communication. Key lesson:
Communication is built on a trusting relationship.
#3 Motivating People. Three important ways to do this: 1) Include others
in the process, every step of the way; 2) Treat people as individuals; and 3)
Encouraged, recognized and rewarded works well done. Key lesson: Motivation can
never be forced. People have to want to do a good job.
#4 Expressing Genuine Interest In Others. "Expressing
genuine interest in others – there's no better way to make people interested in
you. People respond to people who are sincerely interested in them. They can't
help but respond." "Even more important than expressing
interest is showing it." Key lesson: There's nothing more
effective and rewarding than showing a genuine interest in other people.
#5 Teaming Up for Tomorrow. "The
greatest reward a leader can achieve – the greatest legacy a leader can leave –
is a group of talented, self-confident, and cooperative people, how are
themselves ready to lead." Wow! Key lesson: Team players are the
leaders of tomorrow.
These 5 and the other 11
principles outlined in this book is timeless. Since the world today is getting
more and more virtual, the need for leaders of today (and tomorrow) to be relational is all the more important.
I'm aspiring to be a better leader, I teach leadership lessons in churches and
organized seminars twice per year. But based on my personality, relationships
are not my strength. I have to work hard and intentional to strengthen my
human-relations skills. Why? Because leaders lead PEOPLE. People are the reason
leaders exist. Therefore, this book is valuable to me. I recommend this book
wholeheartedly. As a closing, I would like to also recommend John C. Maxwell's
two books on leadership-relationship: 1) Winning
with People (2004) and 2) 25 Ways to
Win with People (2005, with Les Parrott). These two books are what I called
The New How to Win Friends and Leading
People.
THINK BIG.
START SMALL. GO DEEP.
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